Today is the Time!

In our latest video Jeff Parton and myself decided to talk about family a little bit. Now, both of us are family guys that are willing to do anything for them in life, from providing a living to actually dying for them if that's what's necessary. Family is much, if not most, of why we do what we do. They are the fuel that drives us to work crazy hours and often times 6 days a week. But can that be all good?


That's  kind of what I want write about today.

In our busy day to day life at work we tend to get bogged down with taking care of other people such as customers and clients. We often go out of our way to tend to a customer's need or help out a coworker. There's been many times we've come in on our off days to deliver a car only to end up staying all day. It's a normality to come in at about 7:30 and work to at least 7 or so 5-6 days a week. It's not uncommon that we may not get to talk to or see our kids daily because of how late we might work.


Yes, I get it, It's the car business! That's what you should expect!


 I totally understand where you might be coming from by saying that. But, if that's the case, how are you suppose to run a happy and successful family when you focus most if not all your time on your job? Which is more important? Yes, we have bills to pay and a living to provide but if all the money and the job were gone in the blink of an eye would your family still be there?


What I want you to do is evaluate your life and ask..."If there was no tomorrow have I done everything that I can do to show my family how much I love them that doesn't involve a paycheck?"


I want that to sink in because yesterday is gone and you can't get it back. Tomorrow is not guaranteed either so the question comes down to... "What do I need to do today to show them how much that I love them?''


I will be the first to admit that I am one of the worst about putting my job before my family and that I continue to work on it daily. I try not to go more than a few hours without at least texting my wife to see how her day is and to tell her that I love her. Who knows when it's my last time to be able to tell her.


Jeff and I covered 2 pieces of advice that may can help gear you towards a better relationship with your family.(We haven't got it all together either so don't think that we are perfect at this and don't need work along with you).


The 1st thing comes down to you doing a self examination. In other words you need to look at yourself first and see if you're doing all you can do to show them your love. I'm not talking about just merely bringing home a paycheck or buying them flowers and candy, though that may be a part of it. I'm talking about how do you rank them verses everything else. I for one rank God first... though I'm not perfect at that either. You need to do an honest assessment of yourself and see if your priorities are in line. If you can honestly do that then you should be able to have a much healthier relationship at home because if the money stops coming in you still want them there to help you, support you and love you.


The next thing that we came up with is basically what I mentioned a little earlier. Tomorrow is not promised and yesterday is gone so what are you going to do today. Today is the Time so stop trying to put things off that need to be done or repaired today. What if you never get another chance to say 'I'm sorry' or 'I love you'? How would that effect you the rest of your life?(Again, I'm not near perfect at thinking like this either). Time is the one thing we can't control nor get back so don't live life with regrets...trust me... there are many regrets I have in this regard!


At the end of the day your family is more important than your job or money so make sure that your priorities are in line. Make sure that you take just a few minutes, if that's all you have, to tell your spouse and kids that you love them. If you can spend an off day with your family then do it without thinking about work (this is one that I struggle with for sure). If you are going to be there with them then actually be there for them!


I truly hope that this helps someone that is struggling with this. It's definitely hard to do any of this perfectly but you can't do any of it unless you try and actually put some effort into it! Much like it often takes hard work to be successful at a job it takes even more work to have a happy and successful family!

A fish hook to the mouth!

When I was quite a bit younger I liked to fish. We mainly went fishing for bream and catfish in small ponds and lakes. Though I think I did have a small Snoopy Zebco I liked to fish with the cane pole. It was much easier to use since you hardly had to worry about casting it or it tangling up like a reel did. The hooks on the cane pole were generally very small in order to hook the smaller fish such as bream and we usually caught those with live worms. Now, I have never been a professional fisherman though when I was younger I'm sure I thought I was.

One day, after we had finished for the day, we were putting all of our gear up. I was responsible for getting my pole ready for transport home. So, I thought I'd be somewhat smart and instead of gently wrapping the line around the pole I decided to swirl the pole around in a circle in order to allow the line to wrap itself around the pole. Well, the wind must have been blowing a little that day because, as I was performing this brilliant plan, the line and hook got close to my face and as it did I snatched the pole back and guess what happened! That's right!! I caught the biggest catch of the day! Me! The hook got me right in the inside of the middle of my lip and stuck in! Now, it didn't go all the way through but it hurt and it scared me a little. So off to the hospital we went where they sprayed it with some deadening spray and clipped it with some small scissors or something and it was over!

What could I have possibly learned during all this?

Glad you asked!

The first thing I learned after that day is to not swirl the pole around like that so that I didn’t catch another hook to the face! This is also something that you can carry with you the rest of your life too because, as I did that day, you can learn from your mistakes.... Or at least you should! Are we going to do things over and over even after we learned a tough lesson? Yes we are but you should do your best to learn from and or improve from a mistake or poor decision that you've made. I know often times we have to tell our kids over and over to not do something only to watch them do it anyways and eventually get hurt. All we can do is hope they learn from it and move on. You definitely can't dwell on a past mistake or it will keep you down so you must learn from your poor decision and move on and hope that you don't do it again.

The second thing I learned is even though I took the equipment out there to catch a fish I actually caught something totally different than I had prepared for. My point in telling you this is that often times in life we do things that we think are going to touch or attract a certain type of person or employer to what we are trying to promote or sell. We push our social media, for example, to a client base hoping that it might eventually attract us some new business. In doing so maybe we actually attract a new business opportunity or avenue that you had never thought of and it might change your life. My point is that just because you don't feel that what you are doing is working because you don't see the results from the people you are actually targeting that you can't give up. The reason you don't give up is that you may be reaching or touching someone that you don't know you're reaching. You may do something in life that may take years for you to see any rewards or compensation from so just because the results aren't immediate doesn't mean there aren't results. So, in other words, just because you came prepared to catch a fish doesn't mean that's what you are going to catch!

Learn from your mistakes! And don't underestimate the reach of what you're trying to do!

Do you seem to be drowning?

When I was a young kid of about 6 or so I was playing in a lake with my cousins. We were floating a board back and forth across the water when the board ended up floating past me near a part of the lake that was near some over hanging trees. I went to go get it and stepped off into a hole or something and went under. The problem was, at the time, I couldn’t swim and started bobbing up and down in the water. I was doing all I could do to reach up and grab the branches of the shrubs and trees that were there but, from the best of my memory, I could grab the ends but they were so flimsy that I couldn’t get a good enough grip to pull myself out. All of a sudden a guy came swimming towards me and pulled me out and to the shore of the lake. I don’t remember much else about that particular day other than it took me a while to be comfortable going back near the water. It freaked me out so much, I guess, that it took me until I was around 10 or 12 before I actually learned how to swim.

Why am I telling you this story?.. You might ask. 

Have you ever jumped into the deep end of something and ended up feeling like you were drowning?

Often times, in life, we tend to be in such a hurry to do something that we want to do that we just jump off into the deep end when we don’t know how to swim. When you do that you end up drowning. When you drown and stuggle then you end up developing a fear. When you develop a fear then usually you never want to get out of your comfort zone again and try something different. 

Let me be clear, I have no problem with you wanting to try new things and take risks because the most successful people take risks. What I am talking about is jumping off into the deep end without being prepared and ready. Often times we make moves when we haven’t prepared enough or at all. Sometimes when you prematurely jump off into something then you end up struggling worse than you might’ve if you would have prepared first.

What am I suggesting? I am suggesting that it’s okay to start off in the shallow end first! It’s okay to wade in the shallow waters first until you get use to being wet. It’s okay to try and practice swimming before you decide to jump off into the deep end. It’s okay to stay in the shallow end a little longer until you have perfected your technique. 

Certainly it may take you a little longer to learn than someone else. And sure, you may see someone else doing what you want to do and you want to rush your training and practice but if you don’t feel ready don’t go into the deep end yet. Yes, you might be able to make it for a while but you might make it for the long term if you just stayed in the shallow end just a little bit longer. There’s no rush, especially if you haven’t developed the skill you feel you need. 

If you jumped off into something too soon or if you fell off into the deep end when you didn’t know how to swim don’t let that fear that you develop dictate the rest of your life! Much like me almost drowning gave me a fear of water for a while, failing at something that you may not have been ready for can give you the fear of not trying it again or doing something new. If you indeed have a fear because you failed at something just try and understand that at least you tried. Remember, you will never know what you can or can’t do unless you give it a try. 

The moral of this post is don’t let fear be the reason to not do something... you may just need a little more training and practice before you jump off into the deep end!

You struggle at video?

In this social media age it is important to have an online presence especially if you are primarily commission based selling! There are many professions that would benefit from social media but it’s getting to be more and more important for those with there own business or in sales to be noticed online and not merely for just picking up customers but maybe also future employers or opportunities so why are so many hesitant about getting online?

Some of the main reasons are that people are private and don’t want to mingle there personal and professional life. This thought process is the same thought process I had before I started but I finally realized that your personal and professional lives are forever mingled especially if you’re in sales so this thought process has got to go. Another reason is some people are just being stubborn about jumping on the social media bandwagon especially those that might be “old school”. The “old school” mentality can hinder your future business I’m sad to say because there are more and more companies advertising and recruiting on social media than ever before and it’s only going to get worse as well as the amount of consumers that are searching online sources and sites to get the info they need so why wouldn’t you want to be found in online searches?

Are you struggling to want to do videos and post them on social media sites? Does it scare you to death to put yourself out there like that for everyone to see? The answer is probably yes to both of those questions. 

To be honest, I was the same way! Heck, I even get a little nervous about posting videos online now after hundreds of videos posted. I get nervous about how they will do, what kind of engagement I will have and even what kind of good or bad comments they will get so I get it. I understand that you might be scared or timid about putting a video out there for anyone and everyone to see! The best thing I can do is tell you to just do the first one! 

I know it’s easier to say than to do but that’s what I did to begin with! I picked up the phone, actually my 1st video was with a mini hand held recorder, and started recording. My first videos were terrible in my opinion and never thought I would ever reach 1 million views on my YouTube channel but I did! That’s not counting the hundreds of videos I’ve done on Facebook. 

So the question is how did I do that or what advice would I give someone that’s wanting to do video. I came up with 3 that I think will help. 1) Be consistent and don’t give up. This is a very important one to remember because even when you finally pick up that camera to record you may not get the interaction and engagement that you want to get and you’ll want to give up. It takes time to build subscribers and followers so don’t think you will be an overnight success with video and on YouTube because it probably won’t happen. You could put out a good video that may go viral but it’s very hard to do and not many actually do it. But don’t give up and stick with it and you will be okay. Also, you will have haters and naysayers that will tell you that your videos are stupid and you’re wasting your time, I did, but you have to ignore them and keep shooting! You will have people saying negative things about you and your videos on YouTube as well but you have to keep them coming. Just remember that you will most likely have people talking about you anyways so you might as well give them something more to talk about while you’re getting your name and face out there. 2) Your videos won’t be that good in the beginning but the more you do the better they’ll get. The better they get the more comfortable you’ll be on camera. Once you start being comfortable on camera you will be more comfortable being you and making mistakes because we all do. It’s okay to be critical of your videos a little bit because you always want to improve but don’t be overly critical and just put the video out there! You don’t have a choice really once you start doing Lives so you might as well get use to it in your prerecorded ones too! 3) When finally doing videos make sure you understand that Facebook and YouTube are different animals with different types followings. You might post a video on Facebook and get 1,000 views and might also post the same video on YouTube and get 20 so it takes time to learn what does well where which I am still learning for sure. Also know that you’re likely to get many more people commenting, both good and bad, on your YouTube channel so be prepared because when you get those first few negative comments about a video you posted you will want to give up probably. Don’t let that push you away because that’s part of posting online videos and that’s you have to take the good with the bad!

As I continue to learn and grow with my video I want you to understand how tiring it can be to be consistent and not give up. It gets tough to watch some of your videos not get the views you think they deserve but that’s why you have to keep striving to come up with more and better content that people might want to watch. 

Pick the camera up and press record!! That’s the only way to get started!!!

 

Shaking the Coke can!

Do you remember when you were younger and you thought it would be funny to shake up a can of Coke and watch someone open it so it would spray all over them? I know I did it a few times but when I think about it I don't think it would be that funny if it happened to me. It definitely leaves a mess and makes whoever it happens to very mad.

The same type thing happens if you leave a full can in your car when it is hot. The pressure builds up so high that it eventually explodes. That also leaves one heck of a mess and it is very difficult to clean up fully.

Do you ever feel like that can of Coke that has been shaken? Have you ever felt like you could just explode? Well, that's what I am talking about here.

We often times, myself included, let things weigh us down so much that we get frustrated and upset and instead of talking it out we let it build until there is nowhere else for it to go and we explode on someone. Often times it comes out on the closest one to us much like whoever is holding that can of Coke. We are quick to snap on a spouse, a co worker or ourselves whenever we have hit our boiling point. Sometimes it can be simply in a verbal way but often times it could result in a physical altercation which neither one of these things are acceptable. If you were to do something like this there could be severe consequences and even severed relationships.

What can be done that will help keep the pressure from building to that point?

The best way to combat these things from happening is simply to talk it out. I am bad about letting things build up and getting overly angry at something that I really shouldn't simply because I am not one to talk about too many personal things. I often times won't even talk to my wife like I should when there is something bothering me or on my mind. Talking it out is usually the most effective way to handle these things and can also be the most beneficial because there may be someone that could help you or give you good advice. It could be close friend or family member that can just listen to you and maybe even comfort you through some tough times or decisions. It could be someone that is going to give you the cold hard truth even though it could be the most difficult thing to hear. Either way just having someone to go to or talk to can make a huge difference in your life especially if you are one that struggles with life every day and don't ever seem to be able to make it out.

We often create our own toughest times as well. We get into things and make bad decisions that seem to make us think that there is no way out and we lash out at others when that's not necessary. Sometimes we just need to take responsibility and own up to it and deal. We often times need to hold ourselves accountable before we take it out on someone else. Lack of self accountability, I think, is one of the main reasons for unnecessary pressure build up when we want to blame everyone else for our mistakes and problems. You know what I mean??...the victim mentality?!

All this to say.... have someone that you can talk to. Get someone that can be there to listen to you when you are struggling or made a poor decision. Get a mentor or 2 that can be there when you can't figure out a problem or seem like you have no where else to turn. You may be like me and have a hard time trusting people or telling people your problems but it can make a world of difference in your life if you have a couple of people that can help you carry whatever burden that you are carrying...whether you caused it or not.

I hope this may help someone that may be struggling with something to be able to release some of that pressure before you explode!

Laying new floor! So what? What’s the difference?

My latest Facebook Live video had to do with laying new flooring in our house. We are about to put our house up for sale and build a house so we are starting to do some things to spruce it up a little. Now, there’s not much wrong with our house since it was built in 2011 or 2012 but sometimes you have to change some things in order to get the most out of it while possibly changing someone’s perception.

Now, laying down flooring can be somewhat expensive and labor intensive so why would we decide to do this particular upgrade before selling? Well, for starters our house had a lot of carpet and we all know that carpet doesn’t take long to get dirty especially if you have children or pets. So, if there is dirty carpet in the house that could immediately change what people perceive the house to be while walking through the house especially if they think that the first expense they will incur would be quite expensive. So, many times just putting out a little money in advance and investing it in replacing the flooring could make a huge difference in one’s buying discision. Painting could also help which we are doing as well.

What is my point you might ask? Well, much like changing the flooring in a house could change someone’s perception and possibly add value, changing someone’s perception of you could come by just changing something small about what you do or possibly change a characteristic about yourself through effort! It may take some time to change someone’s perception of you but you have to start somewhere. If you’re known as a liar then stop lying! If you are known as dishonest or a thief then stop stealing! It’s that simple! Many times you start doing things every once in a while because you get away with it then before you know it that becomes a habit and then you’re doing it all the time.

I know what you might be thinking! You’re thinking that you don’t care what people think about you! I think that in itself is a lie because most people want to be liked and respected but let’s say that’s not the case for you. If you’re in commission sales of any sort you must care about what people think about you because nowadays you are not the only game in town or in the area like you may have been 10 or 20 years ago. Today a customer can search, price and compare a few different business and sales people online without leaving their house and much of what they find online can determine where they do business! If they search and see that your place of business has a bunch of 1 star reviews doesn’t that affect you if you work there? Sometimes it might affect you directly or indirectly but you must do all you can to change their perception even if you’re not named in the review or source.

The moral of this short lesson is to make sure that what people think and say about you is mostly positive because that could make the difference in your future business! It may not 100% affect you right now but it could catch up with you down the road maybe with your current place of business or possibly a new place that you’re looking to apply. Remember that even business owners and managers may search you online before they make that final decision whether to hire you or not because ultimately your online presence is your new resume whether it’s good or bad!

Do you make a difference?

Jeff Parton and myself did our Facebook Live this morning as usual. Today we decided to talk about that 1 customer or situation that was either special or moved us in some way. I went first and I talked about a situation that I experienced with one of my previous customers.


Wednesday I came in to work, it was really my off day and I hardly take a full one off, but I was in a bad mood. I have been having a few tough days and for some reason or another I couldn't shake it. I was even a little ill toward my wife this same morning which almost never happens. I even got out of my truck and said to myself that I should just go back home since my attitude was terrible. It's rare that I'm in a bad mood but today it was definitely on my back.


As I was getting settled in at work this same morning one of the service advisors came to me and said a customer was here to see me. I then said to him that I didn't have the right attitude right then to talk to anyone. After I said that, I asked him who it was. He then told me her name and I immediately tried to remember the last time that I had talked to her and her husband. She was in service a few months ago and we talked about her husband and how he was doing. He had developed Alzheimer's and wasn't feeling well enough on that day to come in. I ended up paying for half of a new car battery that she needed and she left. I haven't seen her since that day.


Now back to present day.... I walked in the side door and she was standing there looking towards me. I could tell immediately that something was bothering her and that she had something to tell me. I felt that I already knew by the way she looked and the fact that Mr Jullian wasn't with her again. I hugged her and as I was hugging her she started to tear up and inform me that he had passed away last month which would've been May. As I stood there speaking with her I tried my best to comfort here but it's really a hard thing to do when someone loses someone that they really loved. But I noticed something while we were speaking and that was a since of calm that was on her. She started talking about the love for Jesus that he had and that seemed to help comfort her since she knew where he was and the comfort he had and the lack of pain he had. He was now praising his Savior face to face which is something that all true believers dream of.


As we were finishing our conversation she showed me a video from this past Christmas of Mr Jullian smiling as he was listening to a song about Jesus. She told me that he didn't really smile much and that it was hard to see emotion on him but at that particular moment he was joyous. She told me that he listened to that song a few times and the whole time he had that big smile on his face. (Who knows, maybe he was thinking about what it would be like when he finally meets his Savior and it brought joy to him?) After the video we hugged and she looked at me, as I'm trying to choke back tears, and said to me, 'Gary, I love you and so did Jullian and I pray for you all the time. I have your face on the refrigerator and I see it everyday'. At this point I couldn't talk or I would lose it so I said I love you too and thank you for that and walked away. I had no idea how I would continue to stand there and talk with her anymore so I had to go.


Later on I went and took care of her service bill and from what I was told she was almost in tears as she left.


The moral of this story is you never know who you are going to come into contact with that could help or change theirs or your life or at least make an impact on. If you are the last person that someone could potentially come into contact with what would you say? What would you talk about? What help could you offer them that might make a difference in their life?


We get in such a big hurry in life that we sometimes overlook those that are struggling with something and we tend to miss things that we could say or do that might change the direction of their life. I'm guilty of this as well. I have no excuse except of the fact that I can be selfish sometimes with my life and that gets in the way of me noticing someone else's struggles.


I hope this particular post helps someone that may be struggling with something in their life and you feel there is no way out.

How’s your Open Door?

The past few days I did a Facebook Live video on my Facebook page and the primary focus was for you to be able to check your Open Door and see how effective it is. I essentially gave 3 ways to improve it and gave 4 things that you could be missing if you didn’t follow the 3 ways to improve your open door!

Tuesday and Wednesday I basically covered the 3 ways to improve your Open Door. The 1st way is to be Proactive and not reactive. The more Proactive you are with your people the easier it will be for you to head off serious problems and opportunities as well as help keep up morale. In other words, be more seen by your people and let them know that you care by actually talking with them and actually hearing them. Sure, you may have a few that do nothing but complain but those are the ones that are probably hurting your business and culture and need to go anyways. The 2nd point was to actually show your people you care. Much of this could be accomplished by simply listening since that’s all most people want anyways. This doesn’t mean to give them everything they want and fulfill all there demands and desires but simply lending an ear and actually paying attention to what they are saying. The 3rd point was to be interested and involved with your people and in your business. Actually caring and being engaging can handle this one sometimes but if you’re always couped up behind your desk it isn’t going to be too inviting. Remember that most people are timid and intimidated about talking to management especially if they don’t believe your door is actually an open one and confidential one. So, not only to you need to make yourself available you must also be trustworthy!

Now, there are a few things you could miss if you don’t have an effective open door. The 1st is you could miss one of your employees that’s really struggling with something and it would’ve been an opportunity for you to help them. There again if you’re Proactive instead of reactive you might have seen this earlier before it got so serious. The 2nd thing you could miss is the next superstar. There is always one unique and gifted individual that slips through the cracks because they aren’t noticed or shown attention. This mostly happens because management overlooks them because they aren’t involved with their people as they should. Next thing you know is that superstar is working for your competition and there’s nothing you can do now but cry over spilt milk! The 3rd thing you could miss is a great idea. Often times great ideas come from the least greatest of people or situations. If you would just keep your eyes and ears open and actually converse with your people sometimes you might pick up an idea that will send your business skyrocketing! The 4th and final thing you could miss is the fact that someone may be stealing from you or taking advantage of you without you knowing until it’s far too late! This often happens because you aren’t interested and invested in your people enough to be able to pick up on questionable situations and people! If you were this may not happen!

All this to say that I believe that having an effective Open Door or not having one is both the cause and solution of poor morale in the workplace. If you have an effective open door and actually use it regularly then chances are you have pretty good morale in your place of business. On the other hand, if you don’t have an effective Open Door, or one at all, then chances are the morale in and around the workplace is suffering and then so is your profits.

Take a serious look at your Door to see if it’s actually open all the way or is it closed and locked! Just because it’s open doesn’t mean it’s really open to your employees!

Why the debate?

As I sit here on my couch watching SportsCenter I am having a debate with myself about going in to work today! Wednesday is typically suppose to be my day off but I rarely take it off so why am I having a problem with not actually wanting to take it off? I actually have stuff I could be doing today that need to be done around the house so why am I having to justify it?

A little back story.... I am pretty dedicated to my job and employer and have rarely missed a day of work and don’t really ask for much and so often times I work my off days and am usually the first one there in the morning. I am an okay salesman I suppose and I am able to provide for my family as a result. Here lately however I have been questioning if I want to continue in this business and also why I can’t seem to find something else that I’d be good doing. I had previously spent 15 total years with a major retailer and 10 of those years as a manager but also got burned out with that. I have been in the car business now for over 8 years and seem to be getting more and more disgruntled with what I’m doing and the effort that I am putting out! Is it because I’m not happy doing this anymore or am I just not happy where I am.

While having this debate with myself, me and my wife have decided to buy land and build a house in order to possibly go into a future business opportunity. We have just signed on the loan application and am awaiting the close. I can’t, in good conscience, leave this job especially since I make good money. As I struggle with these thoughts I find myself growing aggravated and have been a little bit snappy. 

Where am I going with this? I am simply wondering why am I having to debate taking my day off if I want? Have I put my job in front of more important things such as my family? Or have I elevated the fact that money is the most important thing in my life? I sure hope neither of these are true and that I figure this out because it has caused me to be seriously discontent with many things!

I hope this has helped someone else that may be struggling with what job they are currently doing! Though I haven’t quite figured this out yet I sure hope you do!

Do you have fruit to share or Do you keep it to yourself? w/ Gary Pollar...