Help for a friend!

Many people have bad tastes in their mouths when it comes to car salesmen these days! We are ranked right up there with attorneys and politicians. Some of these feelings have come from experiences of loved ones and friends in the past and some have come from recent situations. Some of them are warranted and some may not be.

There have been a quite a few of us that have been trying to change people’s perceptions of the car business but it has proven to be a daunting and difficult task but we press on! It’s often hard to break down the walls that have been created by past bad experiences but we are trying!

One way to see this is in an effort that is happening as I wrote this. You see, social media has become a very powerful tool. I have met many awesome people around the country and around the world via social media! I have made many friends that I otherwise would have never met and many if not most of them are in the car business or attached to it in someway. 

Two of those people are Chad Morgan and Michelle Sri who are the owners and operators of Quickpage... a video emailing/texting app that is used to send compressed video to clients in order for them to be able to watch and see them easier and better. I have met them online and in person on a number of occasions and both are very caring and genuine people. I have become friends with them and so have many others along this journey over the past year.

I am giving you this short story to tell you that recently they found out that Michelle had stage 3 breast cancer and it is very aggressive. It’s certainly something that nobody wants to have to endure or even at the least even mutter the words “cancer”. They are trying to be strong for their kids and each other but I’m sure it is weighing on their hearts and minds. To go along with this they are self employed which means they have little to no insurance and anyone that knows anything about these medical expenses will know that it’ll be very expensive to treat. 

The cool part is that the automotive industry is coming together to support these wonderful people! We are doing a Facebook Live Telethon starting at midnight eastern tonight and running for 24 hours. There are many of us throughout the industry that will be doing 30 minute segments on our personal pages primarily to pray and to raise money to assist them in their fight to come. It’s a way for us to help a family in need and that’s part of our automotive community.

I will begin my 30 minute segment beginning at 9:30 a.m. eastern tomorrow which is 8:30 a.m. central. I would like for all of my friends to join me on this Live event in order to pray and raise money. If you can’t make it Live here is the link to donate http://fightwithmichelle.com/

Any and all amounts will be appreciated and no donation is too small so please consider this most important donation if you join me or if you’re not able.

We are an industry of individuals that care about others and try and take care of those we love! Help us in this effort to help some great friends and people I have come to love and respect!

Thank you and God Bless

Where have I been?

To those of your that care and that have missed me you might notice that I have been somewhat absent over the last few days from social media. I have been posting some sold customer pics but no videos for a few days.

I wanted to let you know why...

I had an episode last Saturday after my video in where my heart went into AFib. I have had it for quite some time but really don’t have many serious episodes. That day was one of them. Thankfully my wife is a nurse and knew what to do! Not sure what caused it or might have triggered it but they seem to come when they want. I have been trying to treat it with a CPAP machine when I sleep since the Drs seem to believe that lack of oxygen when sleeping can have a serious effect on the heart and I believe that too. I snore terribly and often stop breathing in my sleep and am hoping this will eventually help as I go through this process.

Why has this caused me to stop doing videos recently and being myself?

I’m not sure really! I have never felt like this for so long of a time. I have been extremely short of breath and tight in the chest since that day. I have went and done test and all signs point to anxiety.. and I hope that’s all it is. I have been worried about my heart but I guess that the episode has sprung me, along with a couple of other things, into a severe anxiety issue. I am now taking meds for it, which I do not like taking, in order to see if that’s indeed what it is and to offer some relief but it takes about 2 weeks for them to fully take effect. 

Anyone that knows me surely knows that I don’t like to complain when something is wrong and that I surely don’t like to take meds for these kind of things but I am trying to find answers. 

My hope in letting you know what is going on is I don’t want people to worry too much, if you’re one of those, and to let you know that it’s okay to not feel well and to let people know what’s going on. If you know something is wrong or doesn’t feel right you need to tell someone. Don’t rely on webmd! It could end up being nothing but in the chance it is something serious maybe it can be caught in time to do something about it.

I’m not certain my issue is anxiety and I never want to rule out more heart issues but I wanted to let everyone know where I have been and what’s been going on. I decided to take a few days away from doing videos to try and get this under control. I’m hoping I can start back next week because I actually like doing my Lives daily. I truly appreciate all the thoughts and prayers! 

I love all of you!... even if you don’t love me!lol

Am I going HOME or am I going home?

As I’m sitting in this chair, awaiting the results of the ekg and blood work, I can’t help but wonder if I’ve got something seriously wrong inside me. I also instantly think about my family and what kind of position I would be leaving them in if I never made it out. I hate to think like that but right now they are going through my mind constantly!

I haven’t exactly lived the most healthy lifestyle. I spent many years partying and staying out late while doing drugs and drinking and that could possibly have attributed to this now I think. It’s easy to look back now and see all the stress I’ve put on my body and yet back then my mentality was...”I’m going to die of something someday so I might as well go while doing something I love to do”. I’ve heard many people say things like that and at this very moment that doesn’t help nor apply to me.

I’m currently thinking that I’m certainly not ready to go yet. Yea I know, life isn’t on my timetable and I wholeheartedly agree but it still doesn’t get any easier when you’re going through something with your health that you’re not use to or you don’t know the extent. Were I to leave today I firmly believe that I would be with my Savior but leaving my family isn’t something I’m prepared to deal with right at this moment and I’m sure they aren’t ready either. I know they would also understand that I would be with Him as well but I’m sure it would devastate them. 

I have gone through the past few years somewhat ignoring issues with my body simply because I don’t want to sound like I’m a big baby. I have had numerous back and neck issues as well as dealing with periodic ankle and knee issues but for the most part you can live with those even though there may be some pain and discomfort. The heart, however, you can’t live without. If something stops working with the heart then you stop working. It’s a scary thought when you really think about it. The heart is relatively small compared to your whole body and yet it, and the brain, have the most responsiblility in your body and can determine your life if either one of them shut down or stop working. So, sitting here waiting for results doesn't make me feel any better.

The funny thing is that anxiety can cause some of the same results or experiences that a heart issue can and you could be worrying for no reason. The body is so fascinating and it is a Godly designed wonder that never stops amazing me. 

However these things end up for me are certainly up to the One that created everything. All I can do is live this life in a way that would honor and glorify Him though I fail at that miserably. 

Have you done all you can today to effect someone else’s tomorrow? Have you been able to show the people that you love how much you indeed love them and not just with words? Have you passed on chances to impact someone that you’ve been around because you don’t feel like you have time? Well, you may not have tomorrow so take the time today to make a difference in someone’s life! What better legacy could you possibly leave than being known as one that took their time that you were given in order to help someone else and possibly change their life for their future?!

Which boxer are you?

I use to like to watch boxing. I was always amazed at the abuse they took and the dedication it took to be able to handle all that abuse to their bodies. I was also amazed at the amount of training they went through and how that just the training itself would put their bodies to the test.

When you think of boxing you could probably think of a few names of boxers that you may know or have heard of even if you didn’t like boxing. I automatically think of Muhammad Ali, Sugar Ray Leonard, Joe Lewis, George Foreman, maybe Rocky Marciano, Roy Jones JR, Floyd Mayweather and of coarse Mike Tyson and many more. I’m sure you could think of a few as well. 

When I was a younger man I liked to watch Mike Tyson fight. He was a very strong and aggressive fighter that was known for his ferocious knockout power that could end a fight quickly. A few of us would pitch in money just to get the pay per views and we would have a watch party with as many people as we could get over. It was a fun time when Mike was in his early years. The only problems came when the main event finally came and you might walk into the kitchen for some food and drinks and come back and the fight would already be over. We almost felt like we wasted our money just to have many of his fights to end in the 1st or 2nd round but that’s sometimes what happens in that particular sport. 

When I think about boxers I think about 2 types of fighters. Both would be great athletes for the most part but there are basically 2 categories in my mind.

1) The knockout artist. This is the one that has a lot of punching power usually. He may be the one that has a huge uppercut that might take your head off. He will basically come out and try and end the fight quickly by hitting you with one big haymaker. He may be one that is very aggressive in the beginning rounds in order to bully one into dropping his guard and then laying him out. He may not always have the best agility and footwork and may not even have the best stamina because he has the hopes of ending it quickly. Not all may have limited abilities or skills but often times these fighters might be somewhat one dimensional. 

2) The all around fighter. This is the fighter that has a huge arsenal of ammunition. He may be one that has a fantastic jab and hook. He may be fast with heavy hands and throws a bunch of great combos and counter punches. He may have a strong chin and never intimidated. He might have impeccable stamina and agility. He might even have the ability to switch from traditional to southpaw without even trying. This could be one that could change his fight plan or style during the fight just to throw his opponent off his plan. This fighter might have an uncanny desire to win that allows him to take all his opponents the distance just to win a decision. 

 Both fighters are great athletes and very talented otherwise they wouldn’t be in the ring. One depends on one ability that he may be extremely good at in order to win his fight whereas the other has a full tool box of tools that he can use at any time. He may not be great at one particular ability but he may have many that he is really good at that he can use at his disposal to wear down his opponent. 

Which one are you?

What do I mean?

Well, look at your life and look at your profession. Do you resemble fighter #1 and are possibly one dimensional? Do you only have one skill or ability that you are somewhat good at that you usually rely on heavily? Do you only depend on that one ability so heavily that when a problem or an unforeseen situation arises you can’t handle it? Are you so dependent on that one skill that when you can’t use it then you are very uncomfortable? Do you have problems making it out of the 2nd or 3rd round and never able to go the distance?

Or

Are you like fighter #2? Are you pretty good at a few or many different skills? Do you have an overflowing tool box or an ammo box that is full of useful ammunition? Do you have enough ammunition that you can adjust to any situation on the fly and take it the distance? Are you able to outlast your competition simply by making them go further in the fight than they are able because your stamina and endurance is top notch?

Having a few abilities that your good at is better than only having on that you may be great at. The reason I say that is because if you only have one then chances are you are only able to use that one skill in every situation when every situation may not call for your one skill. When something changes or a problem arises then you may not be able to overcome it because you are one dimensional. However, having a few things that you’re really good at and being well rounded can help you whenever things change unexpectedly. When your unforeseen circumstances come up then you’re able to adapt and adjust without even thinking about it. You would have the uncanny ability to switch from traditional to southpaw without even knowing you did so just because the situation called for it. 

Take a look at what you’re good at and see how you can add to your toolbox. Become good at a few things instead of just great at one just in case your situation changes unexpectedly and you have no other tools to fall back on. It’s one thing to have a pair of pliers in your toolbox and never having to use them and it’s another not having pliers in there at all and actually needing them right at that moment.  

What’s your key words?

Today, during our morning training, I decided to do something a little different with the salesmen. Instead of training on product or process I wanted to train on some possible personal and life principles that may help them inside and outside of work.

My thought process was to try to give them something that may help them in life and that might even get them to thinking about their future. Most of our salesmen are in their 20s and every once in a while I try to train on something that gets their mind away from work and possibly on something that may be more important and even more beneficial.

So, I handed each one of them a sheet of paper and asked them to fold it in half. At the top of the paper I asked them to write down some key words about themselves. In other words, if someone were to search for you online, what key words would you hope they would use to search for you? Key words are primarily what you would use to make sure that your product or service may show up in an online search. I gave them that example and asked them to write down a few. Some of the results were honest, trustworthy, good father, straightforward and loving and there were many others. These were all key words they came up with that they felt they would want to be searched by and these are ones I would say as well.

Once they were finished I asked them to write at the bottom of the page a description of how they want to be remembered in life or what they want people to be able to say about them if they were gone. It didn’t have to be long at all and might even coincide with the key words that they had already written. Sure enough it turns out that many of their key words they wanted to be searched by were also how they want to be remembered. 

We talked about their responses, if they wanted to share, and then I posed a question to them. I asked them to look at what they wrote and honestly ask themselves if they lived these words out daily. Basically asking them to evaluate themselves to see if their key words actually represented their life. Were their key words a good description of how they are living their life now? Only they know those answers.

The primary reason I asked them to do this is because we often think more about ourselves than we should or someone else might think. Many people can look at the way we are living our lives and pretty much tell what we are all about. We often try to put on a facade just to make people think we are something or someone we are not just to impress. The same goes for us. We often want to look at ourselves in a positive light and in no way are we living like we want to believe we are. It’s sometimes very hard to give ourselves an honest evaluation of our character and therefore end up living a life that is opposite of what we want to be portraying to others. I really wanted to see what they thought about themselves and if they would be honest when they evaluated themselves. I totally agree that no one is going to be perfect and living that standard of life all the time but it’s all about the direction and not necessarily perfection. If you can take an honest evaluation of your own life and character then there is a great chance that you are willing to work at trying to be a better person and actually desire to live up to your key words. 

I know that they possibly weren’t really wanting to be honest at that moment when evaluating themselves because what 20 something year old does right? But what I was hoping might happen is it would get them to thinking about where they are currently in life and maybe even where they might be heading or wanting to go. Sometimes just dropping something for them to ponder and think on a little could maybe just maybe get them started on a better path than they are currently on. 

Who are your blinkers for?

Have you ever been driving down the road and someone cuts over in front of you really quickly or maybe makes a quick turn right in front of you without using their blinkers? How did it make you feel? Did it scare you or make you angry? Have you ever done it to someone else? I’m betting that if you’re a driver then you’ve done it at some point or another.

Who are your blinkers for? 

Have you ever thought about that? We drive our cars almost everyday and we probably haven’t really even thought about this question. If you really think about it then it is pretty obvious that the blinkers, in your car, aren’t for you. They aren’t for you! Then who are they for? They are for other people that’s outside your vehicle. They are for the people driving other cars. They are for pedestrians possibly riding a bike or walking down the sidewalk to let them know that you may indeed be changing lanes or maybe even turning. 

Though every car has blinkers it’s true that not everyone uses theirs. I mean they probably don’t use them all the time or at least I don’t. I probably use them 90% of the time but I’m definitely not 100%! If the blinkers are on every car and meant to alert other people then why don’t we use them all the time? Wouldn’t it possibly be safer if we used them like we should? Isn’t it probably more considerate of other people if we used them more often? So why wouldn’t we use them all the time? I’ve come up with 2 reasons why someone might not use their blinkers like they should.

1)  We aren’t always considerate of other people. Many times we don’t think about other people even though we may claim to. We often want to make ourselves believe that we are always thinking of others and always considerate but you probably don’t use your blinkers all the time either! I know that not using your blinkers is not the end of the world and doesn’t always mean we are inconsiderate all the time but just stay with me because I am going somewhere with this.

2) We are always in a hurry. We have busy lives and we always seem to be in a hurry to get somewhere or do something. We often are always running late to work, school or an engagement so we don’t have time to slow down much less use our blinkers. I know that we still use our blinkers sometimes when we get in a hurry but it’s probably very likely that we forget to use them as much as we usually do when we aren’t in a hurry.

Regardless if your aren’t considerate of other people or you are always in a hurry using your blinkers are important. We need to be able to let people know where we are going and what we are doing while we are driving. We sometimes probably take the fact that other drivers will know what we are going to do and maybe not use them but any of these could cause an accident and maybe even hurt someone.

Where am I going with this common sense stuff?

How does this fit into our lives and become a life lesson? 

Well, I’m glad you asked!

We walk through life sometimes and take things for granted. We walk by people without acknowledging them or speaking. Sometimes we don’t acknowledge people that may be having a bad day or don’t say “hi” or “how are you doing?”. We sometimes seem to look past people just so we won’t have to say something to them. Have you ever purposely ignored someone or acted like you didn’t see them just so you wouldn’t have to talk to them? I’m sure you have at some point!  

So why do we do this? What makes us act like this towards other people? And how does not using your blinkers become an example of how we treat people?

Simple! 

1) Just like we are inconsiderate for not using our blinkers sometimes we are also inconsiderate of other people we are around everyday. We come into contact with many people every day. We have people we work with, converse with or even see at the gas station or the grocery store and yet, with all those people we see, we go out of our way to ignore and dodge them. I’m not always the most cordial guy either so this applys to me as well. I also understand that not everyone will nod or speak back if you acknowledge them so I get the fact that it can get tiresome trying to be nice to people especially since some, if not most, will reject your friendliness. 

2) We are in such a big hurry in life that we seemingly don’t have time to acknowledge others. We are walking fast past people or maybe just have our head down so that we won’t have to acknowledge others. We always seem to be running too late to speak or say hi to someone. It’s almost like we are in a race and the only participant is us and we are the only one we are concerned about. 

Whether you are inconsiderate to others or even in a big hurry all the time it is important to understand one thing! You never know when something you say or an action you do to someone can effect their day or maybe even their life. You never know how awful of a day someone is having or what has happened in their life recently. So when you are ignoring, being inconsiderate or in too big of a hurry to notice people you may miss the chance to change their day or make a difference. I’m not saying that every time you speak to someone that they will all of a sudden change their outlook on life but it couldn’t hurt. Maybe you are the icing on the cake. Maybe they had been having a terrible time in their life and you just happen to be the final piece to the puzzle. 

My point to all this is to take time in your life and try and make a difference in someone’s life. It could be a simple “good morning” or maybe just asking how their day is going or if you can help them with something that can change their outlook. Maybe it’s just noticing the fact that they are struggling with something and listening. Somtimes just the mere offering of an ear can make a world of difference to someone’s life. Be courteous, be considerate, stop being in so big of a hurry and acknowledge others because we all live here together so why not at least try to make a difference. 

Though we aren’t going to be perfect at this it only takes 1 to make a difference in someone else’s life!

Do you feel trapped?

Why are we so surprised when a wild animal goes wild? This is the question that I asked on my morning video this morning. The reason I decided to talk about this subject is mainly because of the event that happened over the weekend at a zoo here in the U.S. Apparently a Jaguar got loose in the zoo and killed a few animals. I don't think any people were harmed and I'm not really sure what happened to the Jaguar at this point but I still want to use this as an analogy to get you thinking.

I often hear stories of people getting attacked by wild animals. Many of these animals that are doing the attacking are wild animals that may be in zoos or carnivals or maybe even used for some type of shows but that's not necessarily the only times these attacks happen. I agree that attacks can happen in the wild and with unprovoked animals but the main ones I want to refer to now are the ones that are kept in captivity of some sort.

Think about the people that "train" bears for example, what would we say if the trainers were eventually mauled by a big Grizzly? Or what would we think if someone that trained tigers or lions got attacked and eaten during some training session or during a show? If you heard about some divers that liked to swim with the sharks ended up being attacked by the very sharks they were swimming with what would you say? Or if you happen to hear about an alligator handler putting his head in a gators mouth and ended up getting chomped on what would you think? What about a snake "charmer" that might have gotten bitten by one of the snakes he was trying to charm? What would you say about that?

Though very unfortunate and sad as these may be the very first thing that I think is... "Why are we so shocked when a wild animal acts wild?" Should we be surprised at all when a wild animal uses its natural wild instincts or abilities? Why must it shock us when we hear about someone getting attacked by one of the WILD animals they are in the ring or cage with? Heck, for that matter, I'm not really surprised much when a "domesticated" animal attacks someone much less a "wild" animal. I don't want to see anyone attacked by any animal but I hope you see my point.

And the point is this...

When given the opportunity, a wild animal will try to escape. They will resort back to their natural instincts when threatened or if they desire food. It doesn't really surprise me when I hear of an animal getting out in the zoo by jumping a fence or climbing a wall. Granted, many of the animals that we encounter in the zoos are not dangerous for the most part but for this post I am wanting to point out that most animals, dangerous or not, would possibly try to escape when given the opportunity.

What does this have to do with anything and what does it have to do with me?... you might be asking at this point.

Well, in life we seem to be just the opposite of the wild animals. Instead of desiring to and trying to escape from what seems to be a captive situation we seem to relish in it. We often times talk about how unhappy we are in a job, for example, but instead of doing something about it we just continue to hold on no matter how unhappy we are. Instead of taking a way out we get scared and don’t pursue the opportunity to be free. Unlike the animals that desire to escape, and will when given that opportunity, we seem to be afraid and would rather continue on as we are.

Why is this? I don't really know all the answers but I will offer one.

I think the main reason why we do this is because of FEAR. We are afraid to fail, we are afraid to succeed or we are just plain afraid. We often allow fear to dictate all we do. We get comfortable in a certain situation or maybe a job and because we are comfortable we stay no matter how unhappy we are. We may be content with just getting by even though we might be miserable and though there may be a much better opportunity awaiting us. We may be so familiar with the situation we are in that we don't want to risk anything unnecessarily even though we probably should. Fear is one of the leading causes to us feeling like we are trapped in many of the situations we are in.

How do people get to this point? What makes people have the fear they have? Again, I don't know all the answers but I will give you a couple that I think contribute to this and both of these can actually fall under one category but I will go ahead and lay them out as I have them written down.

1) People make excuses. I am definitely guilty of this one. We tend to make excuses because we are simply afraid to try something or take a chance on something. We start thinking about the things that could happen if we go through with it and the excuses come flowing out. When this happens you tend to give up on whatever idea or plan that you might have had and usually don't even want to think about it or try it again. We allow fear to create excuses and it's usually to make us feel better about the decision that we made.

2) We blame others and play the victim. This is the one you probably witness the most today. When we get afraid we tend to like to blame others for a failure or a missed opportunity in life. We like to point the finger at others when we don't do something that we want to do. When something doesn't go our way we tend to not take that responsibility on ourselves. If we don’t get the promotion or the raise we don’t take responsibility. It’s always someone else’s fault! It’s so easy to blame others for our shortcomings or missed opportunities when many times it is because of us. But it’s so much easier to blame others in order for us to feel better about the situation.

Do you feel like you’re trapped? Do you feel like you’re in a cage and you don’t seem to want to leave? Are you comfortable there or are you just afraid to escape? Are you going to continue to stay there or are you going to be like that wild animal that can’t wait to escape? I know it’s fearful to try new things but letting fear control you can keep you from growing and doing new things in life. You have to stop using excuses and playing the victim! You have to almost get to the point to where you are very much uncomfortable in the situation you’re in to at least attempt to escape. Sometimes you have to climb over the wall, sometimes you have to dig under the fence or you may even need to cut the fence in order to get out just so you can say that you truly have given an effort to accomplish what you think you want to do. You don’t want to go through life with the regret of not at least trying simply because you are afraid. Remember that the grass isn’t always greener on the other side so you may need to research, plan and work harder just to find out what may be the best option for you.